Finished trial.. yeah ! but surprisingly I don't feel excited at all. I feel I lost something and strange that I didn't hold my book to study today. I wish to pick up my History textbook and read. You may think I'm odd but I know myself, I didn't do well in my exam. The chinese essay I picked the first one to write entitled : How Do I Look Upon Myself. I thought about for a few minutes..should I pick this topic ? Normally I write essay is following my heart.. I wrote about myself. People around me have their own talent but I don't have. Last time I felt bad about it and as days go on, I learn how to love myself. I walked out from the shadow. I wrote out the story, at the end I don't know will I get high marks for Chinese..
Recently, I find out that there's another me inside my body. the more emotional one. I went for a talk in Main Convent, the speaker said everyone have two personalities. my 2nd one is more emotional.. EMO-GIRL?? oh no.. but I won't cut myself or do anything stupid. Friends I know won't be together all the time, I know one day each of us will leave to chase after our dreams. But I have been living like this since standard 1..everyday go to school,meet friends, chat ... suddenly change..I admit, there's a sightly unpleasant feeling in my heart. I didn't show out to them, just when I'm alone, I start to think about it. Many friends have started to plan for their further study. Some will stay here, some will leave. When one by one tells me, they want to leave.. yea, study at oversea is good ..but I think : So Fast, everyone has to leave. I'm like..something is missed. My mum says I am not mature enough, friends of course won't be together for a long time. yea, I am immature but you can't stop me from thinking that. sigh...
Sometimes, tears will flow out automatically. Shireen says it is involutary action. I cry more compared to the last 4 years. I wonder is my hormone changed? an abrupt change of attitude.
please condone I sometimes look down ..
Nothing much I wanna say..
it's a rainy day in my heart today ..
